If holding people accountable for crimes they commit is 'divisive', we should probably stop spending all that money on cops

i put eyes on the cat’s bed and could not be happier with the result

You complains that the singular they is wrong because it uses plural verbs.

Why is you not complaining that you uses the plural verbs for the singular you?

You is fool.

One of my favorite bits from my @ConsultSylveon trainings is to ask cis people to share how they know what their gender is *without mentioning their body* and watch them sit there like 😳😶🧐

i think the way it works is as long as the National Debt isnt paid off, every American automatically goes to Hell when they die, which Sucks

fuck, vonnegut calling me out from beyond the grave

I have learned so many things in my life but very few of them have taught me anything really important twitter.com/kurt_vonnegut/…

I found it. the perfect mug for anyone taking T.

(available here: stevenrhodes.threadless.com/designs/your-c… )

once COVID is over all my mask anxiety will turn back into normal ass social anxiety only it will be so much worse because I've grown accustomed to never seeing other people in person

even though I miss the concept of hanging out, I don't think I actually miss hanging out twitter.com/_justwinnie/st…

hi yes t.e.r.f.s dont like the term 'queer' because it's inclusive and it's difficult to use it as a weapon to divide or exclude people

GOOSE NO

@ghalidrim agree to disagree on treat specifics but agree on best treat holiday?

@BethSkw meanwhile, when I turned 13 my mom said “you’re old enough”, sat me down, and made me watch it

I didn’t understand what was happening at all, had never even conceived of the concept of drag. thought franknfurter was a vampire or something?

push T💩RFs into the sea on ice floes, while we still have ice floes, challenge twitter.com/voxdotcom/stat…

@BrianJWork “hmm, no. you are not worthy of food. get a ‘real job’!”
sure, karen, like you’ve ever actually had to work a fourteen hour standing shift and deal with unhinged customers

This is a truly excellent use of the Bernie! The whole thread is worth your time. I had NO IDEA how big tubeworms are! twitter.com/RebeccaRHelm/s…

Corporations funding politicians is just bribery with extra steps. BuT iT’S lEGaL... twitter.com/pinboard/statu…

current status: eagerly awaiting valentine’s day to be over, because then it’s time for the best treats of the year to come back

Overthinking 101

young mads mikkelsen has put me in to cardiac distress

When I describe East Coast vs West Coast culture to my friends I often say "The East Coast is kind but not nice, the West Coast is nice but not kind," and East Coasters immediately get it. West Coasters get mad. 😂😂😂

@tenderlove I thought this was a joke and was gonna say "damn, I thought it was The Ultimate Collection of Winamp Skins" but then I looked it up and this is real

so I know Bernie’s mittens are adorable, and I trust everyone on my timeline is legitimately finding joy in this, but I have to wonder- why is Bernie just sitting and minding his own business so memeable?

If We Raise Minimum Wage, What’s Going to Stop My Kid From Getting a Job at McDonald's, Making More Money Than Me, And Becoming MY Dad?: ow.ly/Bdno50De45g

i do not want to work at your startup

The Simpsons doesn't predict anything we just haven't fixed any of America's problems since 1989.

White journalists telling us why *we* need to listen to white supremacists are actually just different white supremacists pass it on.

Drinking a protein shake as dessert because FUCK YOU

@ckwright I got a bit taller after I started powerlifting, but that was before I started T. how straight your back is makes a huge difference!

The @WhiteHouse website contact form now asks for your pronouns.

it’s his jacket. yeah he’s wearing his jacket that he wears when it’s cold. what is this twitter.com/thealanjohnson…

Y'all, people know that Joe Biden isn't some magical savior. We know there's still work to be done. Accountability, all of that.

But today, people get to be happy *just* because trump is gone.

This has been ROUGH. Seeing him leave is reason to celebrate.

Let folks have that.

Instead of "Godspeed" people should say "dogspeed" because God isn't even real but dogs are like, fast

@ckwright you got shorter? my feet got bigger! shit is WILD

@ckwright thank you! I never thought i’d like becoming stinker and hairier but it’s the literal best????

Entering the Trump presidency // Leaving the Trump presidency twitter.com/ckwright/statu…

Gay people keep one secret for 10 years and then none for the rest of our lives

cis journalists truly write about nonbinary people like we're fully aliens 👾

if you wouldn't write "joe biden identifies as gender man and uses the pronouns he and his" then why are you saying your source "identifies as gender nonbinary and uses the pronouns they and their" lol

“flipping burgers” as an insult is SOOOO funny cause it’s like okay what do you do? type on a keyboard? uh oh watch out mister TypeALot is more valuable lmfaooooooo

@_birdmachine oh, i’ve heard about this with semen.

@sorceressofmath seriously, people keep saying “shanties” plural but the only one they ever specifically mention is this one, and remixes and covers of this one.

truly cannot believe that some cis people have the A U D A C I T Y to call themselves "bio-hackers" for, like, taking naps and not eating enough, when trans folks have been out here growing new genitals and upgrading their hormones and swapping out their facial features.

@sorceressofmath tiktok.com/@nathanevanss/…

@_birdmachine i’m sorry but EXCUSE ME you are doing WHAT with pineapples

Yeah sometimes you have to flush twice.

Years ago I read a tweet that said when you feel you hate everyone, it is probably time to eat, and when you feel everyone hates you, it is probably time to sleep. I think of it a lot and have passed it on to many a grateful loved one. Whoever you are, tweeter, THANK YOU.

Prob just a coincidence that everyone at the Trump riot had people in their personal lives who couldn’t wait to turn them in

Hey, were you put off learning to code because you were told you need to be good at math?

I am a dyslexic programmer and I'm here to tell you that doing a bunch of calculations is literally what computers are for, so no, you don't have to be good at them yourself.

Current events are drowning sea shanty Twitter.

@drunkenGeeBee oh, there are playlists. like: open.spotify.com/playlist/4yC16…

but every single individual shanty post cover/remix/singalong is based off: tiktok.com/@nathanevanss/…

everyone keeps talking about being obsessed with sea shanties, but all the evidence I've seen implies that people only care about that one sea shanty in particular, which is admittedly perfect.

Please follow one trans person on any social media platform before making these hare-brained pronouncements. twitter.com/Schneider_CM/s…

I know I am not the first one to say this, but there are a lot of very well credentialed people in tech worrying what would happen if internet giants collectively de-platformed a group who isn't right wing, while totally erasing the fact that it already happened to sex workers.

Missionaries are colonizers and you can’t change my mind.

sometimes i want to be like "go off king" or "ok queen" but i'm not sure of a persons gender identity i'm like........ go off my liege

My brother just texted me: “I love the fact that the entire moral fate of the country depends on finding just 17 honest Republicans. It’s like some impossible task from a fairytale.”

@DebugSteven just... was so busy dissociating the first time that I don't even remember that time period, kinda

@DebugSteven y'know, I hadn't actually put much thought into it before, but this resonates with me a lot.

whereas before I was busy trying to ignore changes/pretend they weren't happening; now I'm taking progress photos and relishing/anticipating them

@bafeldman Can’t wait for the headline: “WEB DEV ENDS PRESIDENTIAL TERM EARLY; BLAMES JQUERY, WORDPRESS, AND NOT UNDERSTANDING MOMENT.JS”

We all owe Hideo Kojima an apology twitter.com/edgar_a_bitch/…

Americans only love the college experience because it's the only time in their lives they live in walkable communities

I thought I was being clever, putting the litter box on wheels so I could slide it out from under the stairs, but I have inadvertently created a Mad Max-esque vehicle which my cat uses to roll around the house, dragging himself with his front paws, the entire time shitting.

TRUMP SOCIAL MEDIA BANS

- Twitter: 12 hour suspension

- Facebook: 2 week suspension

- Pinterest: Rustic Wedding board deleted

- Livejournal: No song lyrics allowed as custom mood description

- MySpace: Tom removed as friend

If healthcare isn’t a right twitter is probably not a right

Y’all mad a woman is shot dead while storming a Capitol building but don’t care when a woman is shot dead while sleeping in her own house? 🤔

if you use a website to kill people then you might get deleted from the website

Conservatives: LET THE FREE MARKET DECIDE
Free market: *decides*
Conservatives: this is outRAGEOUS

@BethSkw zucchini, kale

Pacing in your apartment because of anxiety? Grab a weight, now your doing farmer walks, good job idiot!

reminder that "we can disagree and still be friends" applies to stuff like enjoying different games or characters. not human rights violations.